Friday, December 24, 2010

Merry Christmas :D

i took this picture last Christmas, aboard the back of the Calabaza sailboat, on a trip to a shipwreck off the Bridgetown Bay, Barbados. The boat was making me a wee bit sick, so our little family migrated to the front and laid down near the speakers. Hot and windy, the boat swayed up and down. Bob Marley & Jack Johnson. All the free Rum punch you could drink. (I went Water- something about the swaying of the boat and Rum punch- they must know nobodies gonna drink it. Also, they put pepper in the punch, which seemed odd to me.) We were aboard with another family, and a couple who referred to each other as My Darling with every sentence. They looked in their late forties/early fifties, and it was, My darling, can you get me my lighter, and Yes, my darling, let me get that for you, which seemed funny and odd but then got sorta nice and endearing. It was the sort of thing that Saturday Night Live skits are made of, but it just doesn't sound very funny when I write it down. Over the course of the next several hours, I heard My Darling & variables of it (My Sweet, My Love, My Dearest, etc.) probably over a thousand times. None of them directed at me (though afterward I'm sure we jokingly referred to each other that way).
The other family was on a cruise, and had only a half day in Barbados with their two sons. We found it odd that on the half day stop in Barbados, they got right on a sailboat, then got off just in time to get back to the ship. Barbados has Monkeys, for Christs sake! Real, cat sized tree monkeys with long tails and cute lil monkey faces. And much more. And in conversations, these folks will tell people they've been to Barbados, when they actually never set foot on the actual land space for more than twenty minutes. Our seven days weren't even enough. But apparently they were snorkel hounds, you know how those snorkel folk are. :P
This Christmas I woke up with a dried green mustache from a nasty sinus infection, remnants of what had bubbled out my nose while I slept. Not pleasant. Food has been a bit of an after thought, and everything tastes funny. On a positive note, I lost three pounds. I am only nine pounds from my goal weight. woo hoo. I was typing and let my coffee get cold again.
I think we may be going to an Asian buffet later, i heard something about sushi and all you can eat crab legs, and it really makes no difference to me where we end up. I wonder what those My darling people will be doing, and if they're still going on. If they are, bravo for them. Bravo for love. And bravo for the differences in all people and how what makes us laugh about some people can be smirked at in a good way. You can only laugh so hard at kindness. Then it just tends to rub off on those whose ears are in reach.
I was thinking about how I secretly like when people wear patchouli deodorant, and often I hear people make fun of it. I've been lighting incense this week, trying to regain a sense of smell, but it hasn't really worked.
It's supposed to snow this weekend. Everyone run and buy your milk and bread? When it snows where I live, no one leaves their house. This is because of the rural area and the lack of road equipment. The roads freeze, then people are stuck all along the sides if they attempt to drive. So the stores sell out of milk and bread with any word of snow. Everyone on their own little Christmas Island.
I hope it does snow. And next week is New Years- we usually go to an Imax for New Years. I think the Imax movie this month is on Tahiti. I've been to Tahiti, did i ever tell you about that? Spent a couple weeks riding on mopeds in the south pacific, ages ago. Steven got giardia, lol- we had to phone in antibiotics from the airport.. But it was awesome. I hope one day we'll get back there.
I'm thinking how stove top stuffing would make a great Christmas dinner. Just a giant bowl of Stove Top. And maybe a slice of pumpkin pie. With more Reddiwhip atop it than the actual slice of pie itself. Chemically laden or processed goodness. Mmmm. (I'm serious. It really sounds good).
Merry Christmas, My Darlings. Wherever you are. :)

Friday, December 17, 2010


I'm typing this with one hand on my phone, and with the other I'm stirring rice pudding.

No. Not really. Really I'm having a Crabby day. I'm very crabby, so crabby I fear I'd best not leave the house today. I have the flu. :(
On the bright side, Dr. Mary Margaret will have to wait while I recoup.
On the not so bright side, I can't think straight, nor eat, and have spent days watching movies under a quilt shivering- not comfortably, either...and my TiVo is not working. If we pause a movie, when we unpause, it scrambles. Which means yesterday the girls and I had to watch Serendipity twice, because we paused it an hour in, and then had to catch it again and just let it play til we saw the end with the second one.
And the idea of food has left my mind for the most part, but last night, I decided to try to make rice pudding, because the bland warm goodness might go down. Not even homemade rice pudding, but the stir in milk Jello brand rice pudding. And it didn't go well.
My pudding was filthy with brown slimey ghosts, and I attempted to pick them out one by one, but it was useless. My too hot stove eye tainted my pudding and I was just left with a dirty pan.
And the flu.
But while attempting to clean it up, I did have this moment where I imagined someone having to bring a dish to a holiday work dinner, not liking the coworkers very much, and perhaps sliding in with a straight face and a brown ghost laden rice pudding. I'm bad that way. But it would free you of any further holiday cooking obligation. They'll tell you, "Oh,you just bring the 7up."
I've been wearing the same fleece pants for three days but it may be five. I haven't begun my Christmas shopping. I did have to drag my sick self out to run errands, one of which was taking Naomi to her guitar class. The Music store has a new line of child sized drumsets for the holidays.
"I will be very disappointed if I don't get a drumset for Christmas," the tiny one says. She stares hard and I can't think. There's no money for a mini drumset, so I just shrug. Maybe one of those Sing-a-ma-Jigs.
I'm tired & crabby beyond measure. I'm easing into the idea of a hot shower and how it could steam the sinuses a bit. Clean underwear. Though my other fleece pants are in the dirty clothes, and that reminds me that laundry is piling up, and to take these off I'll have to put on jeans. Ack. It's funny, when I bought a new pair of fleece pants last, I was at Old Navy with my mother. "Those aren't good!" she tells me," You can't sleep in them, too much static!" But they're snuggly and the only time I notice the static is when I have to get up in the night and I see little flashes of light on my legs getting out of bed in the dark. Freaky but so cosy. Practical if you get them without snowmen or reindeer.
I'm off. I hope you're week is Merry and Bright. And definitely not Crabby. >:(

Monday, December 13, 2010

Retrospect- 12/8/2005

So I haven't done Retrospect in a few months, or maybe a year, I don't remember.
I don't feel normal today. This inexplicable thing? I'm a tortoise in winter.
I wish I were more. For everyone.
So I plan to tackle some reading & maybe clean up the Tivo a bit. :P

& It's suppose to be ten degree's tonite so let's say a little prayer for Marechal Niel, who is not exactly cold hardy; I have her all the same...if I can grow this one, maybe lemons are in my future.

Today I give you Five years ago this week- 12/8/05.

(I have always said if I could meet anyone living or dead, It would be John Lennon, so it seems I ought to talk about him on the anniversary of his death, but the person who actually dragged me to you this morning was someone else...)
Sometimes I wish I could just drive, unencumbered by where I had to be
or what I had to do. This morning is cold, but not too cold, probably low forties. It isn't a bad cold, it's the kind of cold where you don't have to scrape your windshield, but when you breathe the air in, it fills your lungs well; it's the 'steak dinner' cold. I was digging through the console for cds, trying to get away from the Christmas music for a minute, and found a taped copy of my old Lyle Lovett cd. It had been a couple years since I'd played it so I stuck it in. Driving music.
I remember when my love affair with Lyle Lovett started, back when the Joshua Judges Ruth cd came out, the very one I was playing this morning. I remember getting ready to go see him and Bonnie Raitt in concert, putting my suede shoes on. I remember the shoes, because it poured the entire time, and the concert was at an outdoor arena. Walking through the parking lot on the way back, the water was over my ankles. I never wore those shoes again.
I remember Jessie coming by my house. Not my brother Jesse, but the wild boy who once stole a horse and rode it down the Highway 41 to the parking lot of our income based apartment, because I said I loved horses. "What are you doing here so late?" I said.
"I wanted to show you something." And there it was. I never went out with Jessie, he was too wild for me. I'd had a crush on him in ninth grade and back then he made fun of my gigantic glasses. He dropped out that year and had a few run ins with the law- you can imagine why. But he had beautiful dimples, and we stayed friends for years. Anyway..
He showed up at my mom's apartment when I was running late for the concert. Steven pulled up and I put my suede shoes on and ran out the door, leaving him sitting with my mother. He had just gotten married, he said. I hadn't seen Jessie for years before that and I haven't seen him since. I hope he's happy and not in jail somewhere. I can really get off course, huh?
I was sucked in by Lyle Lovett. I adored him. Baltimore made me cry. She's Already Made Up Her Mind made me want to be her. Who was she? As an aspiring writer, sure, I'd love to sell books one day, but moreso, make someone feel something. A something that carries over, not just candied words that you can put down and never think about again. More. This is what Lyle Lovett did for me. I remember Steven and I going on a camping trip (again- rain!) and the day we got back, seeing Don Henley in concert. In between songs, Henley made an announcement. "I'd like to congratulate Lyle Lovett and Julia Roberts on their recent nuptials..."
While I'd been out in the middle of nowhere, in the rain, having to pee in the woods, pretending to enjoy exile from all forms of human civilisation, my 'other man' had married a Hollywood princess. I remember everyone saying Julia had to be crazy- Why would she marry Lyle Lovett? I knew why. And then, today, playing that cd, I remembered again. The funeral song came on at the same time I looked down and passed that flattened squirrel on our road. Yesterday it still looked something like a squirrel. Today, more of a spot.
Enough already. What else is new? I wrote eight query letters yesterday and one 'Thank you for your kind rejection' letter. I'm not so well versed in the art of the query letter, but I was really on a roll with the latter. You all would have loved it.
I lost my keys a couple weeks ago, and have come to the realization that they are gone for good. No more frantic searching, I'm letting go. It's weird, I bought this red leather monkey keychain a few months ago, and looked at my keys. What could I remove to make room for the monkey? There was the pewter Tahiti tiki that I got on my honeymoon ten years ago...and the graceland one from that great roadtrip we had. Various other ones, many keys, grocery store discount cards, and my sainted clicker. I came to the conclusion that nothing could go, and I would hang the monkey on my rearview mirror. That monkey came down and looked at me. "I want to be with you!" the monkey said.
"I want my clicker," I said.
"But I want to be with you more! And the power of monkey juju is stronger than the power of the clicker! OOO OOOO Ah Ahh! Screech!"
"Stronger than the power of Elvis?" I thought to myself. Apparently so. Damn that monkey juju. So I am unlocking my jeep doors the old fashioned way. There are some people who don't even have doors, who have never seen keys, I tell myself. But it doesn't help much.
And I haven't even covered the live raccoon I bought for ten dollars on Thanksgiving, or Hannukah at church, and the fact that I am the Latke Master. (That's the good thing about being Unitarian, we celebrate ALL the holidays). But I don't have time this morning. I hope everyone is happy, healthy & well. My love to you all :)

Sunday, December 12, 2010

Jerry Lawson & Talk of the Town-I'm So Glad (I've Got Skin)

I love this little Noggin video. It's simple & happy. "I'm so glad I got a nose, even though it looks like one of my toes!"

It's cool to be thankful for small things. Like peanut butter.
I am thankful for peanut butter. I eat peanut butter & jelly everyday for lunch, and it's pretty cool.
It might be cooler on those rare days when my husband comes home and whisks me away to the Thai or Indian place for lunch, but even on those days, often I'll eat peanut butter & jelly for dinner.

I'm also thankful for Jimmy Carter, because he grew peanuts...& any occasion that Georgia can turn out a Democrat, AND get him in the White House is a miracle. (Though I believe Ted Kennedy would've made a better President at that time in terms of the status of health reform-it is all about stategy/water under the bridge, etc.) Sometimes, the wrong strategy can make or break a situation; McCain's choosing of Sarah Palin rather than a more moderate candidate like Leiberman gave us the White House this time around, IMO. & I'm thankful for that dumb move. :)

Now, I also believe it was a dumb move for the Kennedys to not jump in and run for office in Mass. when Teddy died, as we could have kept that state blue had they chose that option. Argh.

My head's a wee dopey lately.
I'm seeing another new doctor Friday; for sure I'll be shaving my legs, regardless of it being an Ear Nose & Throat appointment. Any occasion they have to put me in a gown, they may. I guess I'm just too sexy for my own good. Regardless of the doctor's name being Mary Margaret; I'm just too sexy.

Last night we went to an indoor blacklight mini-golf place. We brought a carload of kids, so we didn't keep score, but I do like keeping score in mini-golf. I have an ambitious dream of taking work meetings at the mini-golf, keeping score, all that. Serious mini-golf business meetings.
I may even buy myself a stunning pair of plaid knickers. If someone ever hires me, it'll manifest.

Steven's rented a water cooler, and it's pretty awesome. Instant cold water? Cool! Instant Hot Water? :D! ...We can't drink our tap water-even boiled/filtered, there's some sort of white floaty haze. I don't know.

This week I discovered the difference between chrome & polished nickel. I bought a chrome towel bar but our bathroom lights are polished nickel, so it was a mismatch. I had always previously thought that there was only the one- what I'd called 'the Shiny Silver' I guess. Turns out chrome reflects blue & p.n. reflects amber. Interesting. Or not.

& a big welcome to whoever you are- the Kat Lee Reader has a follower!
That rocks that you'd bookmark my blog, and I did notice. thanks so much :)